Hi Allison,
I am sorry to hear about your parents living conditions. I am curious if your father is a big of a problem as your mother. Can you tell us a little about him? Since she has dementia have you considered getting control of her affairs through a power of attorney? I would think if she had dimentia that was affecting her enough, you would be able to do that somewhat easier. This sounds like it is reaching a breaking point and you can't let your moms situation ruin your own life. One way or another you need to get her out of there. She does have another place to go so putting some outside pressure on her might be the only option. The problem is, and I am sure you already know this...they hoarding is going to follow her as long as she lives independently. The dementia will really inhibit her from the ability to process therapy or any guidance to changing her patterns of behavior. If your father cannot control it, it may be time to consider other living arrangements where she can get the care she needs for the dementia. As far as the cleanup goes, there are no free or even limited funds options out there. This is, as you know, a huge undertaking that is very labor intensive so companies will charge you probably into the thousands of dollars for the cleanup depending on the severity.

My parents live in an apartment building in Queens. They are infested with roaches and mice due to their hoarding and other people in the building who live like pigs. My sister works full-time and I live upstate and have to travel down every week to clean. We got them a new apartment 6 months ago that they still have not moved into because they won't pack and my mother won't allow us to pack. We have not called an agency such as Social Services because we are afraid they might be evicted or not allowed to move into the new space. We can't continue like this, time is running out, money is running out. What can I do? My mother is a huge obstacle. They will not go anywhere to allow us time to get in there and clean out the old apartment. We can't really afford a service to help. They are not full blown hoarders (stuff is in piles) - but we need to get rid of alot. It's hard with someone with dementia - they want to keep things for the memories, but enough is enough. HEEELLLLLPPPPPPP!!!!!